There are various kinds of love in this world, and some people go through their entire life only knowing a few. One of the most uncommon is purely selfless love. In an increasingly selfish world, to love selflessly is a pure experience that’s as rewarding for the lover as it is for the loved.
But what’s the difference between selfless love and selfish love? The main difference is knowing that this love comes from a selfless place. Let’s look at the traits that can help you to distinguish between true selfless love and other types.
What is the meaning of selfless love?
Selfless love refers to the type of love where one’s own needs, desires, or wellbeing are secondary – or even irrelevant – compared to the needs, desires, or wellbeing of the other person. This form of love prioritizes the happiness and needs of the other person above one’s own, which is what makes it completely pure and selfless.
One of the most important ways to differentiate between this form of love and other forms is that with selfless love, the person giving the love does so without expecting anything in return. It is often associated with the idea of “unconditional love” which is love without any conditions or expectations attached.
Selfless love does not mean that you end up ignoring one’s own needs – to the contrary, your own needs are important as they can help you to be a better partner. A healthy love should always involve a balance of care for oneself and for the other person.
While selfless love is a beautiful concept, it is difficult to put into words. Let’s look at some how else we can define selfless love so that others understand it.
Selfless love means accepting that no one is perfect but everyone is enough
Human beings are always looking for happiness. During life, many people search for perfection in others, but the truth is this is impossible. Whilst we should never settle for less, we need to accept that no-one in this world is perfect.
A selfless love is one that accepts that your partner is perfectly imperfect, and you love them for their imperfections.
Selfless love means being willing to compromise and sacrifice
Loving someone selflessly means that at times, you’re willing to sacrifice your own needs and desires. When you compromise and listen to your partner’s desires instead yourself, you’re engaging in selfless acts that put their happiness above your own.
Loving someone in this way is not simple and you may often end up doing things that go against what your mind is telling you to do. This is part of selfless love, as sometimes, you don’t even have a say in the matter.
Selfless love is accepting what’s best for the other person
Selfless love is accepting that the other person may need to be away from you for extended periods of time, whether that’s for studying, for their career or for other reasons. This can be hard, because when you love someone in this way, you want to spend as much time with them as possible.
But you do not ask them to remain with you at all times, because you know that you may hinder their growth in life. In some ways, loving selflessly like this is the ultimate self sacrifice.
Selfless love means you’re willing to walk away for their benefit
Loving one another does not necessarily mean you will end up together. As painful as it may be, you have to put each other’s well being above all else. If you know that you’re bad for them and you truly love them, you may have to cut them off.
In certain situations, love requires walking away from the relationship. A selfish lover will continue to take from a relationship, even if they know it’s not good for the other person’s happiness.
Selfless love means fighting for what you have and never letting go
There’s nothing simple about love. All relationships have ups and downs, struggles and challenges. Loving someone selflessly implies not giving up when you reach the first obstacle, something that some people willingly do.
To love someone selflessly is a willingness to do the hard work involved in a relationship – the truth is that relationships have never been easy, and in an era of Tinder and Bumble, it’s harder than ever to make a relationship work.
Selfless love means being there for them no matter what
For selfish people, it can be easy to abandon people when their life goes wrong, which is actually when they need you the most. Too often in relationships these days people are ready to leave someone quickly when they have a better opportunity come along.
Though, a selfless lover will be there for their partner through the storm, no matter how bad the weather gets. Selfless means putting someone else’s needs in front of your own, whether those needs are good or bad.
Selfless love means giving someone your unconditional support and trust
In this world filled with false idols and toxic selfishness, it’s hard for us to remain optimistic for us romantics. However, selfless love can offer relief from this, as it allows you to trust in someone completely. Giving people your trust is a risky business, because when you give them your heart, you don’t know what they’ll do with it.
Though in these instances, you just have to trust that the other person will take good care of you, both in a physical and a mental sense.
Selfless love is working as a team
Collaboration is part of self-sacrificing love, and working as a team is essential to make any partnership work. Instead of thinking about your own requirements, think about you two together as a team, taking on the world.
You do not simply prioritize yourself above the other – you think about both of your goals in tandem with one another. You’re putting your best efforts into making a relationship work, which means strengthening your bonds with one another.
Selfless love means growing together
When you enter a relationship with someone, you love each other as you are. But the truth is that throughout your relationship you will both grow, and after the years pass, you’ll no longer be dating the same person.
This inspires us to make sure that we help each other grow together. Sometimes, this means putting the other above your own happiness and own goals in life. However, a truly selfless love is one that knows no boundaries, and will do anything to see the other person live a life filled with happiness.